I'd wear matching sweaters with you
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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