Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
