she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
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