I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
I'm both gender and math confused
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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