I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
