everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Woke up backwards on a recliner
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Randomize
