the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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