Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Randomize
