i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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