He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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