Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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