sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Randomize
