girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
