Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
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