I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
