So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
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