He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
