we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Randomize
