We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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