your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
