Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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