On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Randomize
