i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Randomize
