Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Randomize
