you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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