so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Just puked most of my soul out..
His nipple licking is glorious
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