Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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