Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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