You work out of a Hotel?
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
