That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Randomize