She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
