good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
She told me I should be a condom model.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Randomize
