ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
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