So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
