Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
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