she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize