But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Randomize
