Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize