Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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