This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
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