sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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