I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
