idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
