So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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