I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Randomize
