Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
