and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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