Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
