Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
