So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
North Korea, Best Korea!
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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