"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
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